Hi! And welcome to International Amy Day! As promised, I have the link to Joao's blog, here , where he's published an entry I wrote for him (translated to Portugese and everything! No, not by me - I'm not that talented. I trust Joao translated my words well enough).
And! Also! I'm honored to be today's featured writer over at Crazy Hip Blog Mamas. Check out the article I wrote for them here.
Happy reading! Welcome, new readers. Enjoy your stay. Thanks for visiting and participating in (my self-titled) International Amy Day!
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Joao's World
My new friend, Joao, wrote the following - an account of his experience as a disabled man with spina bifida living in Portugal. In exchange, I wrote a post for him to post on his blog, for which I'll give you the link tomorrow, once it's posted. Please help me welcome him to my blog. It's always interesting to get another's point of view - thank you for sharing yours, Joao!
(Following are Joao's words, slightly edited by me. Joao wrote his piece in English, although it is not his first language. My goal in editing was simply to make the reading a little smoother).
Since my first contact with Amy, I wanted to write a kind of a testimonial concerning Spina Bifida and parenthood. Amy sounded like a fantastic mom, almost as good as mine… I was looking forward to finding a point of view about being a mom with Spina Bifida, and not, as usual, a mother with a child with Spina Bifida.
Living in Portugal is not a great thing concerning primary health care. Our struggle, I think, concerning survival relates directly with how we can't quickly find the right persons to treat us and give us security, improving our quality of life and technical support. I think people, because of this particular subject, are afraid about having a baby with Spina Bifida. Not being able to deal very well raising a child who will give them some very specific problems. They forget, sometimes, that these babies can also give them some very specific happiness.
So, can you imagine what people with Spina Bifida think about having a baby with these characteristics? Speaking for myself, and knowing what my mother dealt with during my infancy, I tell you: I am afraid about that and I fear for the health safety of my potential baby.
That's the reason why I, at 33 years old, still haven't thought about having a kid. The technical questions concerning fertility, sexual problems or even finding a mother for the child do not bother me at the moment. They did, actually, but that has subsided some with learning to not be so anxious about that.
Amy emailed me and asked me for a text about being a parent with Spina Bifida. I have emailed her back and told that I thought I would easily find one. But I couldn't find a Portuguese parent with Spina Bifida. Actually, I belong to the board of the Portuguese Association for Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus (ASBIHP). Therefore, I know lots of people with these disabilities in Portugal. But, even so, I could not find the right person to talk to. This was sad for me (although not surprising), because I know that, specifically, boys from this country with Spina Bifida, generally speaking, do have technical knowledge about Spina Bifida as well as their sexuality. ASBIHP played and still plays a very important role in this issue, I think. But there needs to be more.
Anyway, why not having a child for now? For my part, it is not a technical question, I think. It is more of a social question. I feel to care for my child, giving him/her the necessary love and support would be a very difficult issue. This could be impossible for some people because they do not have the job, the money, the car, the accessible house and all the other needed stuff to support, shall we say, a happy childhood and, of course, a happy parenthood.
How can we change this situation, considering that this particular point of view cannot be easily extended to other people without scientific methods? Well, we may have to start over at the beginning: from health care (specially primary health care) to specific sexual advertisement at schools and clinics, I think there should be a focus on these issues from now on.
From me to you… well, yes, maybe I would like to have kids, even though right now it is not a priority for myself. As for other people, I know Portuguese boys and men with Spina Bifida want more information about sexual matters, about medication, about possible sexual dysfunctions, about fertility… about everything.
As far as I know and, thinking optimistically, there are no more than four or five moms with Spina Bifida in Portugal. As for fathers with Spina Bifida, it does not surprise me at all to not find anyone to play this important role. Speaking generally, perhaps males are a bit too anxious about themselves and about relationships. They want the whole world in seconds, the girls in seconds too, sometimes using them in seconds. Sometimes, they do not do this because they're bad persons - they do this because they don't see a future living with someone they really love and care about.
Joao Coelho
(Following are Joao's words, slightly edited by me. Joao wrote his piece in English, although it is not his first language. My goal in editing was simply to make the reading a little smoother).
Since my first contact with Amy, I wanted to write a kind of a testimonial concerning Spina Bifida and parenthood. Amy sounded like a fantastic mom, almost as good as mine… I was looking forward to finding a point of view about being a mom with Spina Bifida, and not, as usual, a mother with a child with Spina Bifida.
Living in Portugal is not a great thing concerning primary health care. Our struggle, I think, concerning survival relates directly with how we can't quickly find the right persons to treat us and give us security, improving our quality of life and technical support. I think people, because of this particular subject, are afraid about having a baby with Spina Bifida. Not being able to deal very well raising a child who will give them some very specific problems. They forget, sometimes, that these babies can also give them some very specific happiness.
So, can you imagine what people with Spina Bifida think about having a baby with these characteristics? Speaking for myself, and knowing what my mother dealt with during my infancy, I tell you: I am afraid about that and I fear for the health safety of my potential baby.
That's the reason why I, at 33 years old, still haven't thought about having a kid. The technical questions concerning fertility, sexual problems or even finding a mother for the child do not bother me at the moment. They did, actually, but that has subsided some with learning to not be so anxious about that.
Amy emailed me and asked me for a text about being a parent with Spina Bifida. I have emailed her back and told that I thought I would easily find one. But I couldn't find a Portuguese parent with Spina Bifida. Actually, I belong to the board of the Portuguese Association for Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus (ASBIHP). Therefore, I know lots of people with these disabilities in Portugal. But, even so, I could not find the right person to talk to. This was sad for me (although not surprising), because I know that, specifically, boys from this country with Spina Bifida, generally speaking, do have technical knowledge about Spina Bifida as well as their sexuality. ASBIHP played and still plays a very important role in this issue, I think. But there needs to be more.
Anyway, why not having a child for now? For my part, it is not a technical question, I think. It is more of a social question. I feel to care for my child, giving him/her the necessary love and support would be a very difficult issue. This could be impossible for some people because they do not have the job, the money, the car, the accessible house and all the other needed stuff to support, shall we say, a happy childhood and, of course, a happy parenthood.
How can we change this situation, considering that this particular point of view cannot be easily extended to other people without scientific methods? Well, we may have to start over at the beginning: from health care (specially primary health care) to specific sexual advertisement at schools and clinics, I think there should be a focus on these issues from now on.
From me to you… well, yes, maybe I would like to have kids, even though right now it is not a priority for myself. As for other people, I know Portuguese boys and men with Spina Bifida want more information about sexual matters, about medication, about possible sexual dysfunctions, about fertility… about everything.
As far as I know and, thinking optimistically, there are no more than four or five moms with Spina Bifida in Portugal. As for fathers with Spina Bifida, it does not surprise me at all to not find anyone to play this important role. Speaking generally, perhaps males are a bit too anxious about themselves and about relationships. They want the whole world in seconds, the girls in seconds too, sometimes using them in seconds. Sometimes, they do not do this because they're bad persons - they do this because they don't see a future living with someone they really love and care about.
Joao Coelho
Monday, May 28, 2007
Mama Monday #60
Theme: Grace
Sweetie was crying the other night. She was upset because, as she put it, she didn't look good - her hair had floppy curls, not circle curls (meaning her head wasn't all over curls, just combed neat so that the curls were only at the ends of her hair).
Her distress - or the way she put it - really disturbed me. At her age - only 4 years old - she thought she didn't look good. What does she know about being concerned with her looks?!
A lot, I guess. Hmmmm. I don't think I like this.
Lord knows I'm not a graceful person. Largely due to my disability, I am always falling down and tripping over myself (although Hubby does say I fall very gracefully. I do know how to fall! I've had a lot of practice.). My feet are always getting out from under me.
Sweetie is already much more graceful than I am in the way she is able to move her body. I'm grateful for that, but it's not my biggest concern with how she grows up.
I want Sweetie to be a graceful, gracious person from the inside out. I want her to know that it's not what she looks like, it's not about having floppy or circle curls, that makes her an attractive person. With my husband and my combined family genes, there's no doubt in my mind Sweetie will grow up to be a tall beauty of a woman.
I just hope we can instill in her a strong sense of grace and duty. To be courteous and well mannered. To look out for the welfare of others. To do what she can to make this world - her world - a better place.
If she can do that - and I feel certain she can - then that state of grace will beautify her being and her life, as well as the lives of others.
Really - what more could a mother ask for?
Sweetie was crying the other night. She was upset because, as she put it, she didn't look good - her hair had floppy curls, not circle curls (meaning her head wasn't all over curls, just combed neat so that the curls were only at the ends of her hair).
Her distress - or the way she put it - really disturbed me. At her age - only 4 years old - she thought she didn't look good. What does she know about being concerned with her looks?!
A lot, I guess. Hmmmm. I don't think I like this.
Lord knows I'm not a graceful person. Largely due to my disability, I am always falling down and tripping over myself (although Hubby does say I fall very gracefully. I do know how to fall! I've had a lot of practice.). My feet are always getting out from under me.
Sweetie is already much more graceful than I am in the way she is able to move her body. I'm grateful for that, but it's not my biggest concern with how she grows up.
I want Sweetie to be a graceful, gracious person from the inside out. I want her to know that it's not what she looks like, it's not about having floppy or circle curls, that makes her an attractive person. With my husband and my combined family genes, there's no doubt in my mind Sweetie will grow up to be a tall beauty of a woman.
I just hope we can instill in her a strong sense of grace and duty. To be courteous and well mannered. To look out for the welfare of others. To do what she can to make this world - her world - a better place.
If she can do that - and I feel certain she can - then that state of grace will beautify her being and her life, as well as the lives of others.
Really - what more could a mother ask for?
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Betcha Can't!
Some Noteworthy Things That Sweetie Can Do, That I Can't
• Use her one foot to push off the shoe on the other foot
• Run around with bare feet all day long
• Eat a bowl full of avocado (Doing so would A- not appeal to me, and B- cause me to have a stomachache because of the latex-like proteins found in them).
• Eat bananas (same reasons)
• Eat as many potatoes as she'd like (I love potatoes but can't eat a lot at once - see latex allergy)
* Take sports lessons of any sort, including dance (haven't signed her up yet, but if she's interested, these are activities she's able to do)
• Walk on her tip toes
• Run
• Jump
• Spin
• Walk on a balance beam
• Go up and down our stairs several times a day.
• Wiggle her toes - and complain about her socks feeling scrunchy.
• Feel when her feet are all crinkly
• Feel with her toes when the bath or swimming water is too cold or hot.
Wow! Isn't she something?! I'm impressed!
• Use her one foot to push off the shoe on the other foot
• Run around with bare feet all day long
• Eat a bowl full of avocado (Doing so would A- not appeal to me, and B- cause me to have a stomachache because of the latex-like proteins found in them).
• Eat bananas (same reasons)
• Eat as many potatoes as she'd like (I love potatoes but can't eat a lot at once - see latex allergy)
* Take sports lessons of any sort, including dance (haven't signed her up yet, but if she's interested, these are activities she's able to do)
• Walk on her tip toes
• Run
• Jump
• Spin
• Walk on a balance beam
• Go up and down our stairs several times a day.
• Wiggle her toes - and complain about her socks feeling scrunchy.
• Feel when her feet are all crinkly
• Feel with her toes when the bath or swimming water is too cold or hot.
Wow! Isn't she something?! I'm impressed!
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Sweetie Saturday #59 - Hot and Bothered Edition
It's hot. I'm bothered (why do people insist on giving me bogus email addresses?!). Let's move on (but, sorry, I'm too miffed and I've already spent too much time at the computer this morning to provide links today - you'll have to just deal....)
Earlier this week I was watching the Ellen DeGeneres Show. Laila and Maks from Dancing with the Stars were on, dancing to a popular Tom Jones hit. Sweetie, in the mean time, was getting herself dressed.
Next thing I know, Sweetie is stark naked, running around the house (ALL around the house - upstairs, downstairs, round and round...) singing...
She's a lady! Woah Woah Woah. She's a lady!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Sweetie loves to spend a ton of time at the refrigerator, rearranging her magnets and carrying on imaginary conversations.
This is her latest, impressive magnet construction.
Wow, Sweetie! That's cool! What is it?
A lock house.
What? What's a lock house?
It's a place for bad people to stay locked up.
And, just to be sure, I just asked her again - What's that you made on the fridge?
A naughty people house.
Now - what the heck are they teaching her at school? How on earth does she know about lock houses? Where'd she come up with that?!
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Grammy and Grampy looked after Sweetie for a bit last weekend while Hubby and I went out for my birthday dinner. When we returned, we were told this story:
Sweetie thought Grampy was Papa Dave. She turned to Grampy and started to say....
Papa Daaaaaavvvve.... is at Nana's house!
Nice save, Sweetie. Nice save.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
After Sweetie's tubbies, I always comb her hair (of course!). It's pretty much the only time I can guarantee her hair will be neat and presentable.
The other night, after combing her tresses, Sweetie went to see herself in the mirror.
Big mistake. Let the sobbing commense!
Waaaaaahhhh. I don't look good!
What?! What's wrong?! You're beautiful! You have curls - you love your curls!
No! I want circle curls - not floppy curls!
Circle curls - when her whole head is perky and springy. Not floppy curls - when her hair is neatly combed and only the ends of her hair are curly.
Don't worry, Sweetie. It's hot weather now - it's Circle Curls season, Toots. Don't you fret!
Earlier this week I was watching the Ellen DeGeneres Show. Laila and Maks from Dancing with the Stars were on, dancing to a popular Tom Jones hit. Sweetie, in the mean time, was getting herself dressed.
Next thing I know, Sweetie is stark naked, running around the house (ALL around the house - upstairs, downstairs, round and round...) singing...
She's a lady! Woah Woah Woah. She's a lady!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Sweetie loves to spend a ton of time at the refrigerator, rearranging her magnets and carrying on imaginary conversations.
This is her latest, impressive magnet construction.
Wow, Sweetie! That's cool! What is it?
A lock house.
What? What's a lock house?
It's a place for bad people to stay locked up.
And, just to be sure, I just asked her again - What's that you made on the fridge?
A naughty people house.
Now - what the heck are they teaching her at school? How on earth does she know about lock houses? Where'd she come up with that?!
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Grammy and Grampy looked after Sweetie for a bit last weekend while Hubby and I went out for my birthday dinner. When we returned, we were told this story:
Sweetie thought Grampy was Papa Dave. She turned to Grampy and started to say....
Papa Daaaaaavvvve.... is at Nana's house!
Nice save, Sweetie. Nice save.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
After Sweetie's tubbies, I always comb her hair (of course!). It's pretty much the only time I can guarantee her hair will be neat and presentable.
The other night, after combing her tresses, Sweetie went to see herself in the mirror.
Big mistake. Let the sobbing commense!
Waaaaaahhhh. I don't look good!
What?! What's wrong?! You're beautiful! You have curls - you love your curls!
No! I want circle curls - not floppy curls!
Circle curls - when her whole head is perky and springy. Not floppy curls - when her hair is neatly combed and only the ends of her hair are curly.
Don't worry, Sweetie. It's hot weather now - it's Circle Curls season, Toots. Don't you fret!
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Hello (Hello, Hello)?.... Is There Anybody Out There?
One of the things I always remind myself is that it's rather pointless to be embarrassed about anything. I mean, the only valid reason you'd have to be embarrassed is if you knew for sure that just one person was at home talking or thinking about your supposedly embarrassing act. If you knew for sure that someone truly was recounting the story, and laughing at your expense - then you have the right to be embarrassed. But otherwise - not at all.
My point is, I can pretty much say for certain that, even if I do something incredibly dumb, odds are that not one witness is thinking about it hours later. They've moved on and so should I. The end.
This is a way of thinking that has saved my sanity on more than a few occasions. I've been comforted by the fact that no one thinks what I've done is as big a deal as I do. As far as they're concerned, I don't even rate as existing.
So why am I, lately, coming up with more and more personal situations that are sitting me on the brink of embarrassment? My Pinot Party birthday party, for instance - did I have too much to drink and say really crazy things? I'm sure I was fine - I'm just, for some reason, feeling a bit self conscious about the whole thing. Or my wine tasting parties. No, I'm not drinking enough to make me lose my head. But because of my naturally shy ways, I inevitably end up doubting my words and actions after the fact, wondering if I ended up sounding dumb or unclear.
On the other hand, sometimes I feel absolutely invisible - and it makes me frustrated. Mostly this happens when I send emails, asking pointed questions, and I never hear back from the person. I need to be in contact with said person to make plans or move a certain situation along. I guess I feel that, since I personally am aware of my email actvities on at least an hourly basis every single day, that the person I'm writing to should also be keeping close tabs on their electronic correspondences.
Yes, if I'm that desperate, I should just pick up the stinkin' phone. And I would. But in most of these cases, I find, I'm trying to talk to someone I don't have a phone number for. Ugh! So, so frustrating. Did they even get my email?! Did they accidentlily delete it? Did they delete it on purpose? Or are the just taking their time with getting back to me? Oh, the possibilities!
Even this here blog can make me feel lonely. As if I'm talking to no one. What selfish pity parties I'm capable of hosting for myself when I write what I think is a particularly funny/moving/important/discussion-worthy post, and yet I get no comments!
But sometimes, out of all the doubts, all the miscommunications, all the silly little things that are said and passed over, there are the few and mighty who do hear.
I used to hear from new readers on a semi-regular basis. But in the last several months, those emails have dropped off considerably.
But now - within the last month or so I've heard from two new readers. Both gentlemen. Both with personal stories of how spina bifida affects their lives and/or the lives of those around them. And both with very nice, encouraging, heart-warming messages. They found my blog and it made them smile, made them feel proud, made them feel connected across the miles. Made them feel as if someone were listening, and writing, for them.
At least that's how I take their kind words. I don't mean to put words in their - or anybody's - mouths. But rather, I'm expressing what I've taken from their emails. How good they've made me feel. Like I truly am doing something worthwhile with this silly little blog. That, even in my simplest "mommy blogger" posts - I am saying something unique and important about my particular experience as a disabled mom with spina bifida.
So - thank you to all who read me. I absolutely love to hear from you, either through comments or through personal emails. But even if you choose to simply lurk - I want you to know how much I appreciate your audience. I know that, for every 1 or 2 emails or comments I receive, there are maybe even hundreds others of you who are touched by my blog as well.
Not that I want to sound like I think I'm some big shot, important Writer with an all-encompassing impressive message for the world. I'm just little ol' Amy writing my little ol' blog. I'm fully aware of that.
It's just nice to know, when you're starting to feel a little bit lost, that there are people out there in the world who've found you, who hear you, who can relate to you, and who care.
Hmmmmm. Makes a girl feel kind of special, that's all.
My point is, I can pretty much say for certain that, even if I do something incredibly dumb, odds are that not one witness is thinking about it hours later. They've moved on and so should I. The end.
This is a way of thinking that has saved my sanity on more than a few occasions. I've been comforted by the fact that no one thinks what I've done is as big a deal as I do. As far as they're concerned, I don't even rate as existing.
So why am I, lately, coming up with more and more personal situations that are sitting me on the brink of embarrassment? My Pinot Party birthday party, for instance - did I have too much to drink and say really crazy things? I'm sure I was fine - I'm just, for some reason, feeling a bit self conscious about the whole thing. Or my wine tasting parties. No, I'm not drinking enough to make me lose my head. But because of my naturally shy ways, I inevitably end up doubting my words and actions after the fact, wondering if I ended up sounding dumb or unclear.
On the other hand, sometimes I feel absolutely invisible - and it makes me frustrated. Mostly this happens when I send emails, asking pointed questions, and I never hear back from the person. I need to be in contact with said person to make plans or move a certain situation along. I guess I feel that, since I personally am aware of my email actvities on at least an hourly basis every single day, that the person I'm writing to should also be keeping close tabs on their electronic correspondences.
Yes, if I'm that desperate, I should just pick up the stinkin' phone. And I would. But in most of these cases, I find, I'm trying to talk to someone I don't have a phone number for. Ugh! So, so frustrating. Did they even get my email?! Did they accidentlily delete it? Did they delete it on purpose? Or are the just taking their time with getting back to me? Oh, the possibilities!
Even this here blog can make me feel lonely. As if I'm talking to no one. What selfish pity parties I'm capable of hosting for myself when I write what I think is a particularly funny/moving/important/discussion-worthy post, and yet I get no comments!
But sometimes, out of all the doubts, all the miscommunications, all the silly little things that are said and passed over, there are the few and mighty who do hear.
I used to hear from new readers on a semi-regular basis. But in the last several months, those emails have dropped off considerably.
But now - within the last month or so I've heard from two new readers. Both gentlemen. Both with personal stories of how spina bifida affects their lives and/or the lives of those around them. And both with very nice, encouraging, heart-warming messages. They found my blog and it made them smile, made them feel proud, made them feel connected across the miles. Made them feel as if someone were listening, and writing, for them.
At least that's how I take their kind words. I don't mean to put words in their - or anybody's - mouths. But rather, I'm expressing what I've taken from their emails. How good they've made me feel. Like I truly am doing something worthwhile with this silly little blog. That, even in my simplest "mommy blogger" posts - I am saying something unique and important about my particular experience as a disabled mom with spina bifida.
So - thank you to all who read me. I absolutely love to hear from you, either through comments or through personal emails. But even if you choose to simply lurk - I want you to know how much I appreciate your audience. I know that, for every 1 or 2 emails or comments I receive, there are maybe even hundreds others of you who are touched by my blog as well.
Not that I want to sound like I think I'm some big shot, important Writer with an all-encompassing impressive message for the world. I'm just little ol' Amy writing my little ol' blog. I'm fully aware of that.
It's just nice to know, when you're starting to feel a little bit lost, that there are people out there in the world who've found you, who hear you, who can relate to you, and who care.
Hmmmmm. Makes a girl feel kind of special, that's all.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Mama Monday #59
Theme: Bloom
You know how I know when it's my birthday? My lilies-of-the-valley start to bloom. My favorite flower - my own special birthday present - every single year.
Happy Birthday To Me!
You know how I know when it's my birthday? My lilies-of-the-valley start to bloom. My favorite flower - my own special birthday present - every single year.
Happy Birthday To Me!
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Totally Wicked Birthday
Guess what Hubby got me for my birthday today? That's right - tickets to see Wicked! Woo hoo!!!! I'm so excited!
.......
Guess how Sweetie's been behaving today?
Right again.... Wicked.
Well, at least my birthday is turning out to be very emotional.
Have a great rest of your day. I hope I will!
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Sweetie Saturday #58
Yesterday, as we approached Nana's house, a baby deer ran across the road right in front of us. I pointed it out to Sweetie.
Sweetie, did you see that?! A deer!
Yeah! I saw it! That's so amazing!
Yeah, kind of, I guess. But not too extraordinary in these parts. Anyway, it reminded me of another time Sweetie used that particular phrase.
I was trying to email someone, but it just bounced back to me.
I exasperatedly called to Hubby that the email I just wrote immediately bounced back. He didn't hear me, but Sweetie did.
That's so amazing, mom!
Huh?... What? What is?
That! What you said!
Oh.... yeah... totally.....
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Sweetie and I were in the car the other day, with her in the back yammering on about one thing or the other. I don't remember exactly what she was talking about, or what my response was. But I said something to the effect of:
You're cute. (or silly, or funny, or whatever....)
Sweetie's answer?
No, I'm a nut!
True, true. That is what I always tell you, isn't it?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
It's amazing how much Sweetie picks up, just from playing in a room while other things are going on.
I was watching Chronicle the other night as Sweetie did her own thing, playing and jumping around.
At one point the show went to commercial. But have no fear! Sweetie informed me,
You're watching Chronicle. It'll be right back.
And then again, when we were watching the Go Through The Door Show. Sweetie's bedtime was smack in the middle of the show. I used to be able to convince her, come commercial time, that shows were, in fact, over. But those days seem to be gone. On this night she whined,
But I want to see all 4 stars in one scene!
Too bad, chicky! Off to bed you go!
Sweetie, did you see that?! A deer!
Yeah! I saw it! That's so amazing!
Yeah, kind of, I guess. But not too extraordinary in these parts. Anyway, it reminded me of another time Sweetie used that particular phrase.
I was trying to email someone, but it just bounced back to me.
I exasperatedly called to Hubby that the email I just wrote immediately bounced back. He didn't hear me, but Sweetie did.
That's so amazing, mom!
Huh?... What? What is?
That! What you said!
Oh.... yeah... totally.....
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Sweetie and I were in the car the other day, with her in the back yammering on about one thing or the other. I don't remember exactly what she was talking about, or what my response was. But I said something to the effect of:
You're cute. (or silly, or funny, or whatever....)
Sweetie's answer?
No, I'm a nut!
True, true. That is what I always tell you, isn't it?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
It's amazing how much Sweetie picks up, just from playing in a room while other things are going on.
I was watching Chronicle the other night as Sweetie did her own thing, playing and jumping around.
At one point the show went to commercial. But have no fear! Sweetie informed me,
You're watching Chronicle. It'll be right back.
And then again, when we were watching the Go Through The Door Show. Sweetie's bedtime was smack in the middle of the show. I used to be able to convince her, come commercial time, that shows were, in fact, over. But those days seem to be gone. On this night she whined,
But I want to see all 4 stars in one scene!
Too bad, chicky! Off to bed you go!
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Flattered... or Flabbergasted?
I definitely think I'm going with flabbergasted on this one. To put it mildly.
Let me explain....
This year - this month - is the time for me to get my car inspected and registered, renew my license, and renew my handicap placard for our 2nd car.
So, with that, I dropped off my placard renewal form at my doctor's office a couple days ago for him to sign.
Yesterday, I got a call from his nurse:
Nurse: You dropped off this handicap placard form for the doctor to sign. Dr. __________ has looked through your chart and can't see any reason why you would need a placard. They take these things very seriously. Can you tell me why you feel you need this signed?
Me: Ah, because I have spina bifida, a birth defect. I wear leg braces. I walk with a walking stick. He's signed this form for me at least 2 times before!
I could have gone on. But really - need I say more?
Not two hours later, I picked up my signed form.
What the heck?! Granted, my doctor is my doctor pretty much on paper only - I think I've laid eyes on the man exactly once. But, regardless, shouldn't my medical chart be absolutely plastered with SPINA BIFIDA PATIENT information?! Even if I've not been to my general practitioner for spina bifida related issues - my chart should be freakin' littered with this knowledge!
I don't blame the nurse - she was just the messenger, after all. But I do wonder - just how big of an !#*/@ did that doctor feel like when faced with the truth of my situation?
Anyone know a good GP in the southern NH area? Ya know - like one with a brain? And eyes? I definitely am on the search.
Let me explain....
This year - this month - is the time for me to get my car inspected and registered, renew my license, and renew my handicap placard for our 2nd car.
So, with that, I dropped off my placard renewal form at my doctor's office a couple days ago for him to sign.
Yesterday, I got a call from his nurse:
Nurse: You dropped off this handicap placard form for the doctor to sign. Dr. __________ has looked through your chart and can't see any reason why you would need a placard. They take these things very seriously. Can you tell me why you feel you need this signed?
Me: Ah, because I have spina bifida, a birth defect. I wear leg braces. I walk with a walking stick. He's signed this form for me at least 2 times before!
I could have gone on. But really - need I say more?
Not two hours later, I picked up my signed form.
What the heck?! Granted, my doctor is my doctor pretty much on paper only - I think I've laid eyes on the man exactly once. But, regardless, shouldn't my medical chart be absolutely plastered with SPINA BIFIDA PATIENT information?! Even if I've not been to my general practitioner for spina bifida related issues - my chart should be freakin' littered with this knowledge!
I don't blame the nurse - she was just the messenger, after all. But I do wonder - just how big of an !#*/@ did that doctor feel like when faced with the truth of my situation?
Anyone know a good GP in the southern NH area? Ya know - like one with a brain? And eyes? I definitely am on the search.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
No Rest For The Weary
So much for my impromtu, Mama's Day Off, Memorial Day Holiday taken early, Happy Birthday Week To Me, Day Off From Work Day. Not only did Sweetie give me grief all day long yesterday (thus prompting the need for 2 glasses of wine and this impromptu Mama's Day Off Intervention gone horribly wrong), but she's kept me up since 3am this morning with her incessant coughing.
Now I'm stuck home with Princess Sicky McCoughypants for the morning when I'd much rather be sleeping, or pampering, or just about anything else.
(Fear not! All is not lost! I'm about to take her to Nana's for the afternoon. Just in time for me to perk up and not feel like I'm desperately seeking slumber, I'm sure).
Oh well. Such is the life of a Mama.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Mama Monday #58
Theme: Haiku Mama
Run around the race.
Sweetie goes boom! Ouch! Split Lip!
Big girl! Healing well.
Run around the race.
Sweetie goes boom! Ouch! Split Lip!
Big girl! Healing well.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
It's My Blog and I Can Flake Off If I Want To
Hi there! Hope everyone is having a lovely Mother's Day out there! I'm having a busy, but great one. Today is also my dad's birthday, so much of the day has been spent at my parents' house, with many other family members, celebrating our two wonderful parents on this gorgeous spring day.
And as my little treat to myself - I'm not going to sweat writing a long, involved post today. Sorry - this is all you're getting.
I'm off to have a glass of wine and enjoy the quiet house (courtesy of Nana's offer to keep Sweetie a while longer at her place so she could play with her cousins).
Enjoy! See you later!
And as my little treat to myself - I'm not going to sweat writing a long, involved post today. Sorry - this is all you're getting.
I'm off to have a glass of wine and enjoy the quiet house (courtesy of Nana's offer to keep Sweetie a while longer at her place so she could play with her cousins).
Enjoy! See you later!
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Sweetie Saturday #57
Last night marked a big occasion in Sweetie's life - she drank her bed milk from a sippy cup for the last time. That's right! No more sippy cups! Down with sippy cups! Boo sippy cups and all their potential teeth-flaring evil.
(Yes, she had her 1st dentist appointment a couple months ago. And, yes, the dentist questioned me then about whether or not she sucks or thumb or uses a pacifier. No and No. So what if it took me this long to realize it must be the evil doings of the sippy cups? I'm not perfect - so sue me).
Anyway, we tried to get rid of the cups earlier this week, but Sweetie would have none of it. Take away her beloved sippies?! Oh, the horrors! So instead I showed her the calendar and told her that, come Saturday morning, there'd be no more sippy cups.
Then we counted down the days.
Last night was the last of 'em. We made a big deal of it, with me singing a celebratory song (to the tune of We Are The Champions) and both she and I ceremoniously throwing away a couple of sippy cups each.
Yay! Sweetie was actually excited about the beginning of this new phase in her life. So much so that, after trashing the cups, she said,
Now, lets throw away my big girl plates!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WARNING: This next one is not for the easily offended or delicately sensative reader. In other words - 4 year old potty talk, straight ahead!
We were at my parents' the other day when Sweetie announced she had to go potty. She ran down the hall to the bathroom, then turned and came back, then turned back towards the bathroom, and once again back out.
I thought you had to go potty - go!
But it keeps going back in and out.
(knowing exactly what I was in for, I asked) What keeps going in and out.
Poop! (like, duh, mom).
Then she continued explaining,
It just keeps knocking at the door.
Oh boy. Just go potty already, would ya?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
As we were driving home a few nights ago, we were stuck in traffic. A few cars ahead of us in the other lane was a Ford pick up.
Look, Mom. That car has American Idol on it.
You gotta admit - she's an observant little girl.
(Yes, she had her 1st dentist appointment a couple months ago. And, yes, the dentist questioned me then about whether or not she sucks or thumb or uses a pacifier. No and No. So what if it took me this long to realize it must be the evil doings of the sippy cups? I'm not perfect - so sue me).
Anyway, we tried to get rid of the cups earlier this week, but Sweetie would have none of it. Take away her beloved sippies?! Oh, the horrors! So instead I showed her the calendar and told her that, come Saturday morning, there'd be no more sippy cups.
Then we counted down the days.
Last night was the last of 'em. We made a big deal of it, with me singing a celebratory song (to the tune of We Are The Champions) and both she and I ceremoniously throwing away a couple of sippy cups each.
Yay! Sweetie was actually excited about the beginning of this new phase in her life. So much so that, after trashing the cups, she said,
Now, lets throw away my big girl plates!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WARNING: This next one is not for the easily offended or delicately sensative reader. In other words - 4 year old potty talk, straight ahead!
We were at my parents' the other day when Sweetie announced she had to go potty. She ran down the hall to the bathroom, then turned and came back, then turned back towards the bathroom, and once again back out.
I thought you had to go potty - go!
But it keeps going back in and out.
(knowing exactly what I was in for, I asked) What keeps going in and out.
Poop! (like, duh, mom).
Then she continued explaining,
It just keeps knocking at the door.
Oh boy. Just go potty already, would ya?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
As we were driving home a few nights ago, we were stuck in traffic. A few cars ahead of us in the other lane was a Ford pick up.
Look, Mom. That car has American Idol on it.
You gotta admit - she's an observant little girl.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
You Missed Me, You Missed Me! Now You Gotta Kiss Me!
Well hello there! How the heck have you been? It seems like ages since I've posted anything!
(Many thanks to Super Hubby for pinch hitting for me on Sunday - even though he didn't post until that evening, when I was home, safe and sound).
Actually, Hubby got a couple comments on his guest post over at Maya's Mom (where my blog posts feed into their site. I wish any comments I got there would automatically turn up in my own site's comment area. Oh well... I digress...). They basically thought he was so sweet to have such a special day with Sweetie and to take such attentive care of her. What a great dad!
I'm too am glad they were able to get outside and run around a bit. That's not something Sweetie and I can do together. Go outside? Yes. Play tag? No. Even Hide & Seek can be tricky for me, if I have to get to my hiding place quickly.
Outside, Sweetie and I can take short walks, blow bubbles, play Stop/Go (with me as the traffic light), or sit on our porch swing while singing, reading, or just restin'. I can also watch her ride her bike or hop on her bouncy ball in the driveway from my spot on the front stairs or swing.
We have a basketball hoop too. Sweetie has occasionally asked if we can bring out the basketball. But we can't do that unless Daddy's with us, lest it bounce out of our yard and down the street. I can't go chasing after it. And I'm certainly not sending Sweetie after it! So cross that one off the Mommy approved outdoor activity list too.
Since my surgery in January, Hubby has taken some of the responsibilty for Sweetie's baths, giving her her Tuesday night tubby every week. Sweetie loves her Daddy bath nights! One - because he lets her play a bit more than I do in the tub, and, two - because he always carries her from the tub to our warm fire in the living room (yes, she's still insisting on going to the phantom warm fire even now in May when it's 80 degrees outside).
Bathtimes with me have her dressing in the bathoom where it, admittedly, can be pretty dang cold. But what can I do?
If I've ever had to run errands after work, I either send Hubby, or I make my stops before picking Sweetie up. It just makes things easier all around. But she's a little older now. So last week when I needed to go to Target for a few quick things, I thought maybe it wouldn't be too bad to take her with me.
And? Well, I guess I was right - it wasn't too bad. But it wasn't too good either.
I had to make sure, as we parked the car, that she understood the rules - hold my hand the whole time, and no crazy-walking - I can't deal with crazy-walking!
She held my hand - mostly. And, for the most part, walked properly. But she did try to pull me in the direction she wanted to go, not the direction I needed to go. Except for that and the couple times I allowed her to walk on her own right beside me and she wasn't watching where she was going, so she almost careened into a few different sets of shoppers - everything was hunky dory.
Still - I'm not sure my little experiment was successful enough to make me want to repeat it anytime soon.
This afternoon, as I pulled into our driveway, I turned back to see Sweetie soundly sleeping in her car booster seat. So I took my things in the house first, then went back to unclick her and guide her into the house.
What a zonked Sweetie! She must have had an active day at Nana's house, 'cuz she was out! When I finally called to her loudly enough to make her stir, I noticed her automatic response was to lift her arms in the air, as if she were to be picked up and carried into the house.
But in the next split second, she woke enough to remember that it was me she was with. So she sleepily, wordlessly, slouched herself down from the car and plodded her way through our kitchen door.
Hmmmm.... I've really thought that as Sweetie has gotten older, this whole being-a-disabled-mom-to-a-healthy-child thing had become more and more of a non-issue. But - it's still there.
She's affected by it. I'm affected by it. Hubby's affected by it. Mostly little things that don't necessarily seem to have a big influence on our daily thoughts and actions. But little things build up, helping to shape one's being - for good and bad.
Sweetie just knows what I can and cannot do. And she knows what she can and cannot do with me. But that's cool with her - or so it seems. I sure hope so, anyway.
I certainly am glad she has such a fun, active Daddy to clown around with, though. And I'm thankful that she gets her needed exercise and socialization both at school and with our extended families.
It does take a village to raise a child. Everyone has something to offer. Someone can always fill in where another person falls off a little. And in the end, if you've all done it right - you get a real sweet, smart, determined, caring and beautiful Sweetie.
I definitely think we're all on the right path.
(Many thanks to Super Hubby for pinch hitting for me on Sunday - even though he didn't post until that evening, when I was home, safe and sound).
Actually, Hubby got a couple comments on his guest post over at Maya's Mom (where my blog posts feed into their site. I wish any comments I got there would automatically turn up in my own site's comment area. Oh well... I digress...). They basically thought he was so sweet to have such a special day with Sweetie and to take such attentive care of her. What a great dad!
I'm too am glad they were able to get outside and run around a bit. That's not something Sweetie and I can do together. Go outside? Yes. Play tag? No. Even Hide & Seek can be tricky for me, if I have to get to my hiding place quickly.
Outside, Sweetie and I can take short walks, blow bubbles, play Stop/Go (with me as the traffic light), or sit on our porch swing while singing, reading, or just restin'. I can also watch her ride her bike or hop on her bouncy ball in the driveway from my spot on the front stairs or swing.
We have a basketball hoop too. Sweetie has occasionally asked if we can bring out the basketball. But we can't do that unless Daddy's with us, lest it bounce out of our yard and down the street. I can't go chasing after it. And I'm certainly not sending Sweetie after it! So cross that one off the Mommy approved outdoor activity list too.
Since my surgery in January, Hubby has taken some of the responsibilty for Sweetie's baths, giving her her Tuesday night tubby every week. Sweetie loves her Daddy bath nights! One - because he lets her play a bit more than I do in the tub, and, two - because he always carries her from the tub to our warm fire in the living room (yes, she's still insisting on going to the phantom warm fire even now in May when it's 80 degrees outside).
Bathtimes with me have her dressing in the bathoom where it, admittedly, can be pretty dang cold. But what can I do?
If I've ever had to run errands after work, I either send Hubby, or I make my stops before picking Sweetie up. It just makes things easier all around. But she's a little older now. So last week when I needed to go to Target for a few quick things, I thought maybe it wouldn't be too bad to take her with me.
And? Well, I guess I was right - it wasn't too bad. But it wasn't too good either.
I had to make sure, as we parked the car, that she understood the rules - hold my hand the whole time, and no crazy-walking - I can't deal with crazy-walking!
She held my hand - mostly. And, for the most part, walked properly. But she did try to pull me in the direction she wanted to go, not the direction I needed to go. Except for that and the couple times I allowed her to walk on her own right beside me and she wasn't watching where she was going, so she almost careened into a few different sets of shoppers - everything was hunky dory.
Still - I'm not sure my little experiment was successful enough to make me want to repeat it anytime soon.
This afternoon, as I pulled into our driveway, I turned back to see Sweetie soundly sleeping in her car booster seat. So I took my things in the house first, then went back to unclick her and guide her into the house.
What a zonked Sweetie! She must have had an active day at Nana's house, 'cuz she was out! When I finally called to her loudly enough to make her stir, I noticed her automatic response was to lift her arms in the air, as if she were to be picked up and carried into the house.
But in the next split second, she woke enough to remember that it was me she was with. So she sleepily, wordlessly, slouched herself down from the car and plodded her way through our kitchen door.
Hmmmm.... I've really thought that as Sweetie has gotten older, this whole being-a-disabled-mom-to-a-healthy-child thing had become more and more of a non-issue. But - it's still there.
She's affected by it. I'm affected by it. Hubby's affected by it. Mostly little things that don't necessarily seem to have a big influence on our daily thoughts and actions. But little things build up, helping to shape one's being - for good and bad.
Sweetie just knows what I can and cannot do. And she knows what she can and cannot do with me. But that's cool with her - or so it seems. I sure hope so, anyway.
I certainly am glad she has such a fun, active Daddy to clown around with, though. And I'm thankful that she gets her needed exercise and socialization both at school and with our extended families.
It does take a village to raise a child. Everyone has something to offer. Someone can always fill in where another person falls off a little. And in the end, if you've all done it right - you get a real sweet, smart, determined, caring and beautiful Sweetie.
I definitely think we're all on the right path.
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Daddy and Sweetie Day (Guest Post)
Hi. Hubby here. I intended to fill in for Amy this morning, but a certain little Sweetie was tying up the computer, entertaining herself with all the games at "peep dot com." (http://www.peepandthebigwideworld.com for the unitiated).
Which allowed me time to wake up with a few cups of coffee and watch "Sunday Morning." Perhaps I'd have been better off loading up on marshmallow peeps, to give me the sugar high I'd need to follow sweetie around for the next ELEVEN hours.
Actually, we had a great day. We played cards, did a little yard work (I got a lovely bouquet of dandelions), then we played hide and seek and tag. Apparently there are new rules to tag, or at least a way around declaring "no tag backs." You must declare "speed tag you're it," and you can't tag the former "it" until after they started running.
So after all that running.... I've got to run.
Which allowed me time to wake up with a few cups of coffee and watch "Sunday Morning." Perhaps I'd have been better off loading up on marshmallow peeps, to give me the sugar high I'd need to follow sweetie around for the next ELEVEN hours.
Actually, we had a great day. We played cards, did a little yard work (I got a lovely bouquet of dandelions), then we played hide and seek and tag. Apparently there are new rules to tag, or at least a way around declaring "no tag backs." You must declare "speed tag you're it," and you can't tag the former "it" until after they started running.
So after all that running.... I've got to run.
Saturday, May 05, 2007
Sweetie Saturday #56 - Busy Weekend Edition
Hi All! Today is Party Day! My Kick Off Event for my TTV business, to be precise. Festivities start this afternoon and there's lots to do before hand! So I've got to make this quick.
(Also, I'm away on a fun Girl's Day Out tomorrow with my book club friends. I'm trying to convince Hubby to write a guest post for me - it remains to be seen if he actually does it or not).
Anyway - back to the Sweetie-ness!
Last weekend was Grampy's birthday. We visited for lunch last Sunday, finishing with a birthday treat of a Strawberry Torte.
We had picked the cake up the day before and Sweetie was excited to see it and taste it.
Sweetie: Oh! A strawberry cake!
Hubby: Actually, it's called a torte. A strawberry torte.
Sweetie: Oh - strawberry torte! "Torte" is French for "cake".
The next day at the party, I thought I'd impress everyone by having Sweetie tell what kind of dessert we'd be having.
Me: Sweetie, what is this dessert called again?
Sweetie: A strawberry....teat!
I thought everyone, including myself, was going to die from laughing! Too funny!
--------------------------------------------------------
Sweetie is a little backwards:
She thinks, when watching Dancing with the Stars, that the dancers did their best work when they get scores where the numbers all match (regardless of what that number is) or if the numbers are closer to 1 than 10.
When watching American Idol, she often thinks the good singers didn't do so well, while the bad singers did a great job.
And she insists that her Winnie the Pooh is a girl and that her paper ladybug on a stick is a boy.
-------------------------------------------------------------
I picked Sweetie up from school on Thursday, but instead of leaving right away, we hung around to check out the kids' Art Show to benefit The March of Dimes.
Afterwards, on our way home, I asked Sweetie what was the best part of her day today - what was her favorite thing?
I expected her usual answer - nap time (yes, that's a little odd - don't know why she likes nap time so much). But instead she said...
The art show! That was the best part! We saw all the beautiful pictures!
Yes, that was pretty special, Sweetie. Very nice, indeed.
(Also, I'm away on a fun Girl's Day Out tomorrow with my book club friends. I'm trying to convince Hubby to write a guest post for me - it remains to be seen if he actually does it or not).
Anyway - back to the Sweetie-ness!
Last weekend was Grampy's birthday. We visited for lunch last Sunday, finishing with a birthday treat of a Strawberry Torte.
We had picked the cake up the day before and Sweetie was excited to see it and taste it.
Sweetie: Oh! A strawberry cake!
Hubby: Actually, it's called a torte. A strawberry torte.
Sweetie: Oh - strawberry torte! "Torte" is French for "cake".
The next day at the party, I thought I'd impress everyone by having Sweetie tell what kind of dessert we'd be having.
Me: Sweetie, what is this dessert called again?
Sweetie: A strawberry....teat!
I thought everyone, including myself, was going to die from laughing! Too funny!
--------------------------------------------------------
Sweetie is a little backwards:
She thinks, when watching Dancing with the Stars, that the dancers did their best work when they get scores where the numbers all match (regardless of what that number is) or if the numbers are closer to 1 than 10.
When watching American Idol, she often thinks the good singers didn't do so well, while the bad singers did a great job.
And she insists that her Winnie the Pooh is a girl and that her paper ladybug on a stick is a boy.
-------------------------------------------------------------
I picked Sweetie up from school on Thursday, but instead of leaving right away, we hung around to check out the kids' Art Show to benefit The March of Dimes.
Afterwards, on our way home, I asked Sweetie what was the best part of her day today - what was her favorite thing?
I expected her usual answer - nap time (yes, that's a little odd - don't know why she likes nap time so much). But instead she said...
The art show! That was the best part! We saw all the beautiful pictures!
Yes, that was pretty special, Sweetie. Very nice, indeed.
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
My Moment
What perfect timing! I was just considering writing about the following, when I got the notice from Maya's Mom to write a post about My Moment. Okay! Will do.
This coming Sunday I'm meeting with my book club, as we do once a month. It's always so much fun, very opinionated, and a lively discussion to say the least. We've been meeting for a year now - in fact, this Sunday is our 1 year anniversary as a group. Happy anniversary to us! We're a small group of ladies - there are only 6 of us - but we do have fun. I'm so very glad my friend and I decided to start this club and that we've been able to meet and become friends with such smart and wonderful women.
Directly after our Sunday morning meeting, most of us (save my mom, who's also in the book club) are hopping in a car and heading on down to Boston for the afternoon to see Respect - A Musical Journey Of Women. After which, we'll go out for a bite to eat. It's going to be a long day, but a fun one. I cannot wait!
Hubby will be on full-on Daddy Duty all day while I get to have My Moment with my friends, celebrating our roles in this life as women, wives, daughters, sisters, friends, workers, mothers, and so very much more.
Thinking about this Sunday adventure, I realize that not only has it been a long time since I've done anything like this, it's actually going to be the first time since having Sweetie that I've taken an entire day away, just for myself. No, check that - it may be the first time ever in my adulthood for me to go out with girlfriends and have A Day.
Until now, I've always been too busy for friendships, too shy, too awkward, too self conscious, too - I don't know, just too. In college I actually found it easier to be friends with guys rather than girls. Later, in the workplace, other than my now Hubby, I never particularly latched on to anyone, forming any stronger bond than casual work friend. It really wasn't until I became a mom that I reached out to other new moms and started to make some really great friends.
And now - Happy Mother's Day to me! I told Hubby, with all sincerity, that my day out on Sunday is my Mother's Day gift. Sure, I decided to go and I paid for my ticket. But we share the money, so any random gift he would have come up with would have technically come out of my wallet as well. Having a day out with The Girls is a gift to me unlike any material object he could present to me. It will be a time to hang out, connect, laugh, share and just 'be".
After all, I've always told Hubby that my most favorite gifts from him are experiences - give me a surprise trip or a spa gift certificate over a new sweater or a plant any day. Things get old, get lost, or die. Experiences create memories you can cherish forever.
So - My Moment is coming. My Moment will last an entire day. Sure, My Moment will take me away from Sweetie for longer than I've been away from her in a long time. But she's in good hands - I know she'll be thrilled to have a Crazy Daddy and Sweetie Day. And it will feel that much sweeter to wrap her and Hubby in my arms when I return - refreshed, rejuvenated, and ready to face another day.
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