Mama Monday #79

Theme: Virgin(ity)

Yesterday Hubby and I had a fight. A stupid, angry fight. Yelling (both of us) and crying (me). And Sweetie heard it all. She came to silently stand in the corner of the room we were in - tears down her face and sadness in her eyes.

After a two hour separation, Hubby and I each stewing (I mean, getting over it) in different rooms, all was fine. It really was a stupid fight over a stupid misunderstanding. It's not even the type of thing I'd normally bring up here, or anywhere, at all. My only point in writing about it is the effect it had on Sweetie.

When Mommy is sad and crying it makes me feel like I want to cry too.

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Yesterday evening we had AFV playing on the T.V. Not a show that we usually watch, but it seemed to be the best option at the time.

Watching Sweetie watch this, I wondered if she'd think injury-inducing "comedy" would be funny to her or make her upset to watch. But my curiosity was relieved after a couple different "ouch!" videos made her only giggle a little bit - because she didn't quite understand just how painful the accidents could have felt to the recipients.

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Next we all sat on the couch to watch the latest episode of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. We three watched as the opening video ran, showing the incredibly heart-wrenching difficulties the family in need suffered through, bringing them to the point of desperately needing a new home. This family had dealt with it all - flooding, fire, theft - really too much for one family to have to go through.

After the description of their fire, Sweetie asked me,

What's a fireball, Mama?

Oy. This. All of this = NOT. GOOD. Danger, Will Robinson. Warning ahead - be on the lookout for rampant nightmares tonight for one little Sweetie girl. (which - surprise! - she did have. Although she tearfully informed me that she simply couldn't sleep - it wasn't a bad dream).

In the following few minutes of the show, Sweetie was whimpering a bit, rubbing her eyes, and cuddling into me.

Oh no.

I wish..... I wish.....

What is it, Sweetie? What do you wish?

I wish.... I wish that my birthday was going to come sooner days than it is.

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Dear Sweetie -

You know what I wish? I wish that you could always keep your incredible empathy for others while never having to go through any personal difficulties in your own life. And I wish that you could always keep your youthful virginity regarding all the tragedy and despair that exists in this big, sometimes frighteningly bad world of ours.

May your life be full of many, many happy birthday wishes and peaceful blue sky days.

Love,

Mama

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